As I was browsing through the internet in the pursuit of finding a job, I found myself growing more and more desperate with every single reply I haven’t received. Job hunting has left me more than desperate.
At this point, you all know that I have been feeling empty and lost. I tried to take some time off to find myself and feel better again. As days went past, I found myself growing more and more impatient because the better feeling just wasn’t coming. Depression takes more than just a few days to leave, and you have to address the issue if you want it to leave permanently. In my last post, I told you that writing it down, or talking to someone about it helps, however, it doesn’t get to the root of the problem.
I’m not gonna lie. My current financial situation has played a role in my current mental situation. I haven’t book looking for and applying for jobs in a while. Throughout university, blogging was a sufficient way to help with my expenses. But now that I graduated, I simply want more. I’m tired of living in a houseshare. I’m not complaining though. The house I live in is nice, the area is quiet, and the landlord is a sweetheart. But I want more. I want to be able to afford a little studio flat of my own. I’m tired of writing travel bucket lists and never visiting those places.
I also thought it would provide me with the experience I would need for the type of job I’d be applying for if I’d be looking for one. Yeah, IF. My ultimate goal is to be fully self-employed one day. Oh well, have I been wrong with the experience! Apparently, you need years and years of experience to do any job out there nowadays. The position I’m trying to apply for often calls for at least seven years of experience. Well, I’ve got more like two years of experience. But then the question is how are we supposed to get experience when no one gives us a job?
It’s like being tied to a tree. The knife is close to you, but not close enough to reach it. You can’t reach it. You can’t untie yourself either, and the only way to free yourself is to cut the rope with the knife. But you can’t do that because you can’t reach it.
As I was browsing through the internet in the pursuit of finding a job, I found myself growing more and more desperate with every single reply I haven’t received. Job hunting has left me feeling more than desperate. Here’s the part where you are probably expecting me to say something like: “and then I found a job”. Countless applications sent and even more “instant match” emails from job-seeking websites later, I still remain jobless. Well, not really. SARA VIKTORIE is a registered business, so technically I’m self-employed. But still.
See you soon!
xoxo, S. V.